There seems to be a new infestation in the county where I live; Mennonites. We live in a very rural area and these pests seem to be overrunning all the local farms. Overrunning them in the sense that they're buying them all. You can tell that they are a Mennonite farm because they are neat and well organized and there isn't liquid manure spread as far as the eye can see. It's UnAmerican.
Traditionally, Mennonites have worn bonnets ranging in color all the way from black to gray. The caps, which are different from bonnets (don't ask me how) have been white. The reason is that in the bible it says a woman must worship with her head covered, in obedience to the commands given in 1st Corinthians 11:2-16. These commands state that a Christian woman should have long uncut hair, and that it should be modestly covered with a veil that is a sign of her being under the authority of her husband or father. These commands come from the Apostle Paul, who also suggested that a woman's mouth should be covered in church as well, a practice that most churches sadly don't follow.
People confuse the Mennonites with the Amish. The Amish are an off-shoot of the Mennonites; in 1693 Jacob Amman led an effort to reform the Mennonite church. He wanted to include the practice of shunning, where you refuse to have anything at all to do with anybody who leaves the church. Actually, if you've ever left a church for any reason you know that shunning is widely practiced today.
When the discussions fell through, Jacob and his followers split from the Mennonite church. Amman's followers became known as the Amish; and they all moved to Pennsylvania. The Amish are considered very backward in their social customs, so they figured they wouldn't stand out so much in Pennsylvania. They would have gone to West Virginia but they aren't that backward.
Today the Amish are very similar to the Mennonites except they don't take take Visa. They like to think of the Mennonites as Amish Lite. The Mennonites have tended to take a slightly different tack on some modern conveniences, such as motors. They drive vans, (usually black), tractors and riding lawnmowers. Apparently, a Mennonite one day saw a tractor plowing through a field and suddenly looking at the rear end of a horse didn't seem so appealing anymore. Oh, and they run their own schools.
Mennonite boys and girls aren't all that different from their non-Mennonite counterparts. Take away the modesty, respect and clean language and you can hardly tell them apart. The girls wear a bonnet in school because “The bonnet fosters the proper sense of godly reserve and shamefacedness, especially in regards to interaction with the opposite sex, that is becoming of a young woman.” There is shamefacedness in public schools as well, only it's on the faces of the teachers as they walk down the hallways in the midst of the interactions between the opposite sexes, which make Roman orgies look like English tea parties. Thank God there's only three minutes between classes.
Mennonites have also embraced free enterprise; there is a Mennonite run grocery store that we shop at. I know it's contributing to the takeover of our county, but hey; the prices are good and so is the quality. And unlike Aldi's, they even put it in a bag for you. You can buy all the major food groups there; fresh fruit, sliced deli meats, homemade bread and donuts. And unlike the major supermarkets, there's no need for a bank located inside where you can get a loan to pay for everything.
Back when I was calling on churches for the photography company I worked for, we did a few large Mennonite churches. My photographers complained because the people were too nice; they wouldn't stop feeding them. The waiting was orderly and polite, the children weren't running all over the place knocking down equipment, and they bought a lot of pictures. So my crew told me; no more cults!
So I guess that being overrun by Mennonites isn't the worst thing in the world. In fact, it could be much worse; we could be overrun by Democrats or Republicans. There's no getting rid of those pests even if you spray every four years.
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